WHO’S TO BLAME?

My sister Mia on the right little miss NaeNae on the left on bring your own slurpee cup day.

I want to preface this post by giving my deepest and most sincere condolences to the family of Neveah Nicole Hawkins and acknowledge all the lives she touched and the joy she brought to this world in her short life and wish her 3 little brothers and one little sister my deepest apologies. In a world full of hell at least we had a little backwards heaven. RIP Neveah Nicole Hawkins 10/31/2001-11/08/2019.

So what all of you don’t know is when I agreed to start writing for this blog I had one main goal… Be Real. I didn’t want to make it seem like I lived a perfect life I just wanted to share with people some of my thoughts, some of my epic diy’s, some of my recipes and just remain true to me and real with you that’s all. So with this three weeks over some people might wonder where Bennita’s house went? Did I stop writing? Did I get sick? What Happened? Well the simple answer to that is life happened and once again I really wish I could stop the ride and get off because this last corkscrew was/is crushing. So in order to stay real to myself and with you guys I figured I would be honest and maybe vent a little and hopefully help some people out that are also going through this.

Lets rewind all the way back to the year 2011 we were all younger everything felt better yada yada yada. My sister and brother attend elementary school in Bremerton WA because they are just wee children and both make friends not just any friends though they both make best friends… My brother’s a little younger then my sister and one day I will share his story hopefully but today is not the day… Today is for Neveah or NaeNae as she was called in our home. Where do I begin? My sister Malia and Neveah were almost like sisters for a long time. I don’t really recall a time up to about a year ago where NaeNae wasn’t at my home, hanging out with my sister or brother, playing with my daughter that she called her niece or just generally being at my home to be at my home. She was almost like having another little sister or another child because she called me and my husband her adopted parents it was just normal. Well about a year ago life happened again. My sister and NaeNae got into some arguemnts over stupid teenage stuff because they are teens and didn’t talk for a while like sisters and best friends do. They sorted their issues out and things were getting back to normal or so we thought.

Let my say that normal for our house may not be normal for other people. It was normal for any of our friends to stop by and basically live with us for a few days and then go away and not see them again for a month or two and NaeNae was no different. She had gotten a few jobs and graduated early and was just in general very busy. Her and Mia (My sister) would make plans then NaeNae’s job or Mia’s scholl schedule would get in the way but hey we are young we have the time we will catch up later right? So lets get down to the hard stuff. NaeNae was a wonderful person and her and Mia talked often. They had planned for NaeNae to come down to our Nana’s house for thanksgiving with us (Because we celebrate late) and everything was going great. NaeNae was so excited to see the family and to show off what ultimately never happened her new tattoo she was going to get on November 8th because she had just turned 18 on Halloween… Sadly all she got out of the adult world was 9 days…

On November 8th, 2019 at approximately 12:15 pm NaeNae went to turn out of a side street neighborhood her in Kitsap county and was T-boned on her driver side door taking the left turn. She sustained the blunt of the crash and was medically airlifted to Harbor view Hospital in Seattle, Wa with the passenger her boyfriend not far behind in another helicopter. Sadly due to the force of the crash and the injuries she sustained her body could not take the fight and she passed away at 3:26A.M. on November 10th. Now before you ask the driver was okay just a few bruises. There is no name released and after you read on a little more maybe you will understand why we as a family are not so mad at him… And yes the passenger of NaeNae is in stable condition but does have several broken ribs and a broken back and survivors guilt.. He is 20 years old… So let me explain the title to this post Who’s to blame!

A lot of you reading this may be very upset at the driver that hit NaeNae and to that I say you are entitled to your opinion and her family is probably very upset at him but he is not even a contender in this race for who to be mad at and who to blame no no no that race is between two very affluent front runners here… USPS (United States Postal Service for those outside the USA) and Kitsap county and/or the city of Poulsbo, WA. Now the million dollar question here is why? Why be mad at these two entities when they are not the ones that hit NaeNae and caused her life to end? Well the billion dollar answer is because they might not have been the ones driving the car they are at fault. Why? Because a blind intersection and bad mailbox placement that has cause at least two other fatalities… Now don’t get me wrong at first we were all very upset at the driver whomever he may be. Was he drunk? On Drugs? Speeding? Was he distracted on his phone or the radio playing his jam and he just stopped paying attention? Tired even. All those things raced through our head as we attempted to pick the broken pieces of my sisters heart up after the news came in. All these questions remained for days and left us angry and hurt and desperate for answers but in reality after the report came out it was simple… According to reports and statements from residents of the side street neighborhood the mailboxes impact line of sight unless you are driving and SUV of some sort and there is no stop sign or light there to warn oncoming northbound vehicles that there is a neighborhood right there and cars will in fact be coming and going… Nothing to try and prevent what happened to NaeNae and 2 to 3 other people. So my question of who do you blame goes unanswered in a way. Do you blame USPS more for not moving the mailboxes when it’s clearly been brought to their attention that it impacts line of sight exiting the neighborhood or do you blame the county and/or the City of Poulsbo more because they haven’t attempted to put in a stop sign or a blinking yield light or a 2 way stop right there after numerous fatalities and a ton of accidents resulting in injury? I guess we may never know who to blame more but, what I do know is something has to be done about it and someone has to say something. In Memory of NaeNae and of the other victims of this deadly intersection my sister and I have decided to petition not only the post office but the county to do something about it. Wish us luck.

And in closing I would just like to say thank you for letting me vent and for all the love and support I know this will one day get. I hope hearing the short story of Nevaehs life and reading what happened will spark a light in everyone to love a little deeper and put stupid stuff behind you. You never know what is going to happen and what cards life is going to deal you. I hope you latch on a little closer to those you love and always remember to say I love you because you never know when its going to be the last time someone hears it from you. Stay safe everyone and I hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving. Love Bennita’s House!

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